... full-time freak?
Sometimes I feel like I'm a part time mother. Except for the first 10 weeks, when I was on maternity leave, living every second with Rian. Now I have to take care of my baby only for a few waking hours every day. Then off I go, to work. Spend 8 hours in a chair thinking sometimes about my babe at home.
The first 10 weeks of life at home with Rian were amazing. They were also the ones with the most ups and downs. Day in and day out, all I was doing was changing Rian's diaper, feeding Rian, and putting him to sleep. After the 8th week, things got a bit rewarding, when Rian started responding to our overtures with beautiful smiles. He used to play a lot in his gym. We'd started going out for park visits.
Through my baby's first year, we were lucky to have my mom and later Amit's parents around to help us. Now that we're planning to fly solo (nanny to take care of Rian), this part time mother wonders how life's going to change. Nervous and excited at the same time, taking on new challenges, bonding more closely with Rian compared to the past few months. No more sleep-ins on Saturday mornings, as we'd have to take care of Rian. Eventually late nights will be out, else we'll be napping with Rian on the weekends :-)
Friday, July 31, 2009
Thursday, July 30, 2009
You are my sunshine
... my only sunshine
My dear sweet Rian. You make my mornings shiny bright. Yesterday you woke up before mommy and daddy. You were sitting up, and as you saw Daddy's eyes open, you started clapping your hands with glee! Mom had turned the other side, so you climbed over mom to peek at her face, how cute! Mommy and Daddy asked for kissie, and you obliged with that wide open mouth.
Today mommy and daddy woke up before you did. You opened your eyes and felt mom's hand on you, and followed it, turned towards mom, and gave her the most precious smile. How we love when you squeal with joy, then scurry off to climb the pillow mountain and get on top to touch the wall hanging...
And now some words from U2 for you, my babe:
Baby slow down
The end is not as fun as the start
Please stay a child somewhere in your heart
My dear sweet Rian. You make my mornings shiny bright. Yesterday you woke up before mommy and daddy. You were sitting up, and as you saw Daddy's eyes open, you started clapping your hands with glee! Mom had turned the other side, so you climbed over mom to peek at her face, how cute! Mommy and Daddy asked for kissie, and you obliged with that wide open mouth.
Today mommy and daddy woke up before you did. You opened your eyes and felt mom's hand on you, and followed it, turned towards mom, and gave her the most precious smile. How we love when you squeal with joy, then scurry off to climb the pillow mountain and get on top to touch the wall hanging...
And now some words from U2 for you, my babe:
Baby slow down
The end is not as fun as the start
Please stay a child somewhere in your heart
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Mom rules
Yes yes, I rule as Mom ;-) but that aside, many times I feel compelled to write set of rules for moms. So many things learned over the the past year, experienced first-hand by making those golden mistakes... maybe some day I will learn from myself! For what its worth, here goes:
- If it ain't broken, don't fix it. Seems such an easy one for mom's to follow. But sometimes we're in this "let me experiment" mode. When Rian was ~3 months old, we tried to change his baby wipes on suggestions our friends gave us. Well meaning friends, of course, but all babies are different. We were using Pampers Sensitive Wipes at the time, and a friend recommended using Kirkland wipes - cheaper, stronger, and had "cotton". We also discovered they had less moisture unfortunately, and for that cute young butt, something was not right. Rian had his episode of diaper rash which unfortunately lasted for almost a week. Thanks to Boudreaux Butt Paste, he finally recovered. Yet, mommy chose to make the same mistake again. A week back all was well in brushing land. Rian was happy brushing morning and night. A friend suggested "try the tooty frooty flavor", and off went mommy again, experimenting. Our little fellow absolutely hated it for 3 days. Then it struck me - let me try my plain old toothpaste again, and here he was, a happy baby, letting mommy do brushie brushie.
- Throw guilt out the window. We live in a complex world, and are always trying to overachieve. Be it lofty goals like "I will catchup with my TODO list today", or "I will spend 3 hours with Rian today", or "I will breastfeed for a year". Its great to have a goal to motivate you, but mommies, please, don't stress yourself out if you can't. Easier said than done, but try to let go and relax. Enjoy the present with your baby. There will always be dishes to do or that teether to buy online or that document you owe your manager. And it will get done when it has to get done.
- Don't compare. I seriously detest comparison mommies. Many of them will go "Is Rian eating table food yet", "is he walking yet", "oh, mine calls me mummy since she was 9 months old, does yours?". If you're using these as conversation starters, sure. But don't make it the only thing you talk about. There are so many more interesting things to talk about, like what's the latest park you've been to.
- Learn from your baby. Sometimes babies are just not ready to try some things. Take cues from your baby, listen to them. But babies do tend to get into their comfort spots, so when the pediatrician tells you to introduce the sippy cup, that's the time to push your tot.
- You know your baby best. Even though you may spend just an hour every day with the baby, way less than the baby sitter or day time care person, trust your instincts and believe me when I say you know your baby the best. Take comfort in the fact that you have a special connection, and your baby will tell you what's wrong with him.
- Dad knows best, too. Dads love to chip in. Moms need to let Dads do it their way. Help them when they ask for it, but in general, don't micromanage them. No one likes that.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Rian has left the building
Almost... For almost a week now, Rian can open doors. His intahligant mommy taught him how to carefully open doors: stand on the side, then pull the handle down :D he he he ...
And now mommy's brain is planning to leave too, but not before a coredump -- BEEEEP -- here goes!
Rian now remembers... lots of things! He loves destroying towers of blocks we build for him. He has loads of masti up his sleeve. Check out this YouTube video of Rian and pillows on our love seat.
Rian loves exploring. He dutifully tries to open drawers in Aaji's bedroom and examines every small thing on Aaji's side table. Check out his YouTube video.
Rian sports a cute choti a few mornings, when mommy gets irritated with his long hair going into his eyes.
Rian claps when he's happy :-) It's pretty cute to see it in person. You all are invited! Aaji has taught him "ithe ithe bas re mora" and he can now point with his forefinger. This one is even cuter than Rian clapping, trust me.
2 weeks after he started walking on his own, he's now trying to run ... after geese! We discovered and fell in love with a new Park in Cupertino, Memorial Park. We went there on Saturday and Sunday evening.
Last week Rian surprised us by sleeping from 10 to 6 for a couple of nights. This week, he's back to his usual routine of waking up ~2-3am and we have to live with his kicks after that, in our bed.
Last week we tried to cut down Rian's acid reflux medicine drastically (from 1.7ml/day to 0.5ml/day) and it backfired, as usual. The poor fellow was in misery for at least 3 continuous days as food travelled back up his throat :-( We witnessed an 11pm awakening with loud wails that subsided only 15 minutes after Tylenol made it into his system. After a long time Rian threw up on Daddy's t-shirt. Sigh. Up goes Zantac, to 1.7ml/day.
Rian was up at 4am today, and didn't sleep until 5:15am, and wanted Daddy and Mommy to play with him. Since it was night #2 he was keeping us awake, off he was bundled, to grandpa and grandma. So thankful they are here now, dreading the days when we won't have that support.
Yawn. Gotta sleep now. Almost time for Rian to start doing his wakeup routine!
And now mommy's brain is planning to leave too, but not before a coredump -- BEEEEP -- here goes!
Rian now remembers... lots of things! He loves destroying towers of blocks we build for him. He has loads of masti up his sleeve. Check out this YouTube video of Rian and pillows on our love seat.
Rian loves exploring. He dutifully tries to open drawers in Aaji's bedroom and examines every small thing on Aaji's side table. Check out his YouTube video.
Rian sports a cute choti a few mornings, when mommy gets irritated with his long hair going into his eyes.
Rian claps when he's happy :-) It's pretty cute to see it in person. You all are invited! Aaji has taught him "ithe ithe bas re mora" and he can now point with his forefinger. This one is even cuter than Rian clapping, trust me.
2 weeks after he started walking on his own, he's now trying to run ... after geese! We discovered and fell in love with a new Park in Cupertino, Memorial Park. We went there on Saturday and Sunday evening.
Last week Rian surprised us by sleeping from 10 to 6 for a couple of nights. This week, he's back to his usual routine of waking up ~2-3am and we have to live with his kicks after that, in our bed.
Last week we tried to cut down Rian's acid reflux medicine drastically (from 1.7ml/day to 0.5ml/day) and it backfired, as usual. The poor fellow was in misery for at least 3 continuous days as food travelled back up his throat :-( We witnessed an 11pm awakening with loud wails that subsided only 15 minutes after Tylenol made it into his system. After a long time Rian threw up on Daddy's t-shirt. Sigh. Up goes Zantac, to 1.7ml/day.
Rian was up at 4am today, and didn't sleep until 5:15am, and wanted Daddy and Mommy to play with him. Since it was night #2 he was keeping us awake, off he was bundled, to grandpa and grandma. So thankful they are here now, dreading the days when we won't have that support.
Yawn. Gotta sleep now. Almost time for Rian to start doing his wakeup routine!
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Chicken pox from the vaccine
Last Thursday (16 July) when we got home, Rian was very cranky and had not had his naps properly. We had noticed some red marks on his legs the day before, and presumed them to be mosquito bites. On closer inspection this day, a random thought came into my mind. It was the 10th day of his 1 year vaccines (given on 7th), and I remember the doctor mentioned we may see a rash from the MMR. I thought this was related to measles. It completely skipped my mind that he received Varicella as well. We called PAMF after hours nurse support.
Usually the advice nurses are very good, but this time around it took forever to speak to one, she didn't have Rian's record in front of her, asked me tons of questions about this "rash", and the conversation wasn't very nice. Meanwhile Amit had given Rian some Tylenol, so baby had his dinner without incident and had seemed to calm down quite a bit. We missed the urgent care window by 10mins, and decided to monitor Rian overnight on our own. The next day was Friday and was WFH so I could monitor the little fellow and take him to urgent care if required. Since he was fine throughout the day, albeit a bit cranky, we decided to skip the visit to the pediatrician.
On Friday night though, one red spot on his leg and one on his right hand seemed to be full of "water" and the one on his leg burst. Now we were concerned, and got an appt for Saturday morning 10:30am. The doctor (Amy Henegan) was very nice to us and explained this was classic chicken pox from the vaccine, a 1 in 100 chance. She handed us some anti-biotic ointment to prevent infection of those boils. Since the virus is attenuated for the vaccine, this chicken pox does not spread to healthy people. Phew, what a relief!
Today Rian is getting much better, and the boils have reduced in size. They're still there though, and the one on his hand burst and made a big wound :-( My brave babe is taking the boo boo quite well, I should add. A few 6am wakings :-) and a few low grade fevers asides, he's my sweet little pumpkin. Get well soon, meri jaan.
Usually the advice nurses are very good, but this time around it took forever to speak to one, she didn't have Rian's record in front of her, asked me tons of questions about this "rash", and the conversation wasn't very nice. Meanwhile Amit had given Rian some Tylenol, so baby had his dinner without incident and had seemed to calm down quite a bit. We missed the urgent care window by 10mins, and decided to monitor Rian overnight on our own. The next day was Friday and was WFH so I could monitor the little fellow and take him to urgent care if required. Since he was fine throughout the day, albeit a bit cranky, we decided to skip the visit to the pediatrician.
On Friday night though, one red spot on his leg and one on his right hand seemed to be full of "water" and the one on his leg burst. Now we were concerned, and got an appt for Saturday morning 10:30am. The doctor (Amy Henegan) was very nice to us and explained this was classic chicken pox from the vaccine, a 1 in 100 chance. She handed us some anti-biotic ointment to prevent infection of those boils. Since the virus is attenuated for the vaccine, this chicken pox does not spread to healthy people. Phew, what a relief!
Today Rian is getting much better, and the boils have reduced in size. They're still there though, and the one on his hand burst and made a big wound :-( My brave babe is taking the boo boo quite well, I should add. A few 6am wakings :-) and a few low grade fevers asides, he's my sweet little pumpkin. Get well soon, meri jaan.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Sleepwalking
A couple of nights ago, I was exhausted from work and an early morning, and hit the pillow at 10:30am, alone. Rian was asleep in his crib since 9:30pm. Amit was watching TV and later working, downstairs. When Amit came upstairs at 11:30pm, he saw: Rian and me stuck to each other in bed :-) and pillows neatly stacked on Amit's side of the bed so Rian doesn't roll-off!
Till date I have no recollection of even waking up to get Rian from the crib. Even in my sleepwalking episode, I was so cautious that I stacked pillows ;-) I'm impressed with my own maternal instints.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Walking toddler
It's been two weeks since Rian took those first few steps unassisted. Suddenly a day after his birthday party, Rian just decided to start walking... all by himself... 30 steps, and more. And now he's all over the place. He never once wants to crawl anymore :-) Here's a YouTube video of Rian Butala crawling.
In these two weeks, Rian has also lost almost all his baby fat :-( I can feel his bones now when I hug him. Eh my poor little sweet thing, please don't grow up so fast... slow down...
[Edit on 7/15/09]: Since Monday 7/13/09, Rian is also on a new sleep & wake-up routine: we are brushing his teeth at night after his milk, and in the morning before his breakfast. Rian does not get any milk in the middle of the night now.
Rian now has 6 pearly whites :-)
In these two weeks, Rian has also lost almost all his baby fat :-( I can feel his bones now when I hug him. Eh my poor little sweet thing, please don't grow up so fast... slow down...
[Edit on 7/15/09]: Since Monday 7/13/09, Rian is also on a new sleep & wake-up routine: we are brushing his teeth at night after his milk, and in the morning before his breakfast. Rian does not get any milk in the middle of the night now.
Rian now has 6 pearly whites :-)
Rian's first birthday party
We celebrated Rian's first birthday party at Las Palmas Park in Sunnyvale, on Saturday 11 July '09 with a lunch party. We booked the recreation building in the park. This park holds a special place in my heart: this is the park where Rian gave us his widest grins and smiles for the first time. A lot of our guests mentioned to us that the loved the venue. Little kids could roam around in the park and many had their food outside.
We catered food from Turmeric restaurant. They delivered it to the park in big black insulated boxes. This avoided the need for "burners" and stands for the food trays, and no "burnt" spots in the food. Personally I loved the food and was drooling for it from the day we had the menu decided. We had spinach and aloo tikki (green) and veg manchurian balls (pink) for starters. The chef threw together this excellent salad with sprouted moong beans, cherry tomatoes and strawberry pieces, with sweet chutney thrown around. Everyone was crazy about it. There was some raita and chutneys too. The main dishes were koftas in chutney gravy, spinach and corn, panchratna daal, naan, pulav with peas and almond slices.
The cake was ordered from Amia Bakery. We got a quarter sheet of Tres Leche cake with mango pieces in it. For our special friends, we also had a 6" eggless cake of the same flavor.
The evite stated 11:30am to 2:30pm but surprisingly people came in much later than we expected. We were hoping to cut the cake at 12:30pm but I think that's when we got started with appetizers. The cake was next as we wanted to finish it before Rian got cranky or sleepy. He was pretty much a happy baby except for all the crying he did just when the cake was being cut and that's how all his pictures are :-) Cely helped us a lot, mainly taking care of Rian and then later in the cleanup phase as well. Aaji Ajoba helped feed Rian. Sometimes I wonder: what exactly was I doing in the birthday party?? Daddy helped setup the place, along with our close friends who helped decorate: thanks a lot guys...
Thank you all for the wonderful wishes and the thoughtful gifts. Rian will be getting them one at a time, to avoid gift overload. FYI Rian loved pulling the wrappers off of his gifts :-)
We catered food from Turmeric restaurant. They delivered it to the park in big black insulated boxes. This avoided the need for "burners" and stands for the food trays, and no "burnt" spots in the food. Personally I loved the food and was drooling for it from the day we had the menu decided. We had spinach and aloo tikki (green) and veg manchurian balls (pink) for starters. The chef threw together this excellent salad with sprouted moong beans, cherry tomatoes and strawberry pieces, with sweet chutney thrown around. Everyone was crazy about it. There was some raita and chutneys too. The main dishes were koftas in chutney gravy, spinach and corn, panchratna daal, naan, pulav with peas and almond slices.
The cake was ordered from Amia Bakery. We got a quarter sheet of Tres Leche cake with mango pieces in it. For our special friends, we also had a 6" eggless cake of the same flavor.
The evite stated 11:30am to 2:30pm but surprisingly people came in much later than we expected. We were hoping to cut the cake at 12:30pm but I think that's when we got started with appetizers. The cake was next as we wanted to finish it before Rian got cranky or sleepy. He was pretty much a happy baby except for all the crying he did just when the cake was being cut and that's how all his pictures are :-) Cely helped us a lot, mainly taking care of Rian and then later in the cleanup phase as well. Aaji Ajoba helped feed Rian. Sometimes I wonder: what exactly was I doing in the birthday party?? Daddy helped setup the place, along with our close friends who helped decorate: thanks a lot guys...
Thank you all for the wonderful wishes and the thoughtful gifts. Rian will be getting them one at a time, to avoid gift overload. FYI Rian loved pulling the wrappers off of his gifts :-)
Sunday, July 12, 2009
I'm in love...
...in love, with you, my babe. You give me the warm fuzzies with your wide grin and gleeful giggles. You melt my heart with the slightest frown. That trickle of tears turns me inside out. You make me so proud, you are my shining star as you tranform into a toddler and do your unstable dance. One call and mommy is all yours. I love how you go to sleep on me, your face nestled in my neck. Time, please freeze and let these moments last forever. It's as if you were waiting to hit the one year mark: Now you are speeding toward all new milestones!
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Early to rise
Rian woke up at 4:30am for his midnight feed. I prepared the formula, Amit fed him and put him back in his crib. Typically Rian wakes up ~6-6:30am and then I drag him back to our bed, for 2 more hours of snooze time. Today Rian woke up at 6am, but by the time I went to get him from his crib, he was wide awake. Last night I came in after Rian went to bed (beauty parlor appt), and Rian was so excited to see me, he was all smiles and coos :-) cho chweet. I tried to rock him back to sleep, and I usually succeed within 5-10 mins. No such luck today.
30 minutes into rocking, lullabies, silent prayers, some cursing under my breath, and the little one was still awake and giving me the most cute and wide grins. I put him down on my chest and I was lying in bed. Once in a while, he'd pick his head up, come to my lips, pucker his lips and give me a kiss and a wide wide smile :-) Oh I was melting inside ... he he he ...
Finally I gave in to sleep, and handed Rian over to his grandparents at 6:30am for an hr and a half more of sleep. Sigh, missed out on our play time with Rian this morning. Gotta go home & make up for it!
For the record, Rian didn't go back to sleep even after his grandparents tried very hard today. I think he took a morning nap today after mommy & daddy went for work ~9:45am. Reflecting back on this, I was thinking: this is my last month of having Rian's grandparents around. After that I guess I'll be up with Rian at 6am :-) Scary thought!
30 minutes into rocking, lullabies, silent prayers, some cursing under my breath, and the little one was still awake and giving me the most cute and wide grins. I put him down on my chest and I was lying in bed. Once in a while, he'd pick his head up, come to my lips, pucker his lips and give me a kiss and a wide wide smile :-) Oh I was melting inside ... he he he ...
Finally I gave in to sleep, and handed Rian over to his grandparents at 6:30am for an hr and a half more of sleep. Sigh, missed out on our play time with Rian this morning. Gotta go home & make up for it!
For the record, Rian didn't go back to sleep even after his grandparents tried very hard today. I think he took a morning nap today after mommy & daddy went for work ~9:45am. Reflecting back on this, I was thinking: this is my last month of having Rian's grandparents around. After that I guess I'll be up with Rian at 6am :-) Scary thought!
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Baby registry
I compiled a list of all baby items for a registry for dear friend of mine. What better place to share it than here, so here goes Copy-Paste :-) from my email.
Some are TODOs:
• Cocoa butter – stretch marks prevention. Start using around now. It didn’t help me but apparently it helps quite a few people.
• Cord blood – You want to do this early. Figure out if you want to store or donate. We had planned to donate it but we were not qualified. Donate here: http://www.cryo-intl.com/
• Babies R Us: My registry is still online. That was my “shopping list”. I often went back and edited it to keep it in sync with what I bought for Rian. Anyways I have some recommendations below too. Start looking from here http://www.toysrus.com/shop/index.jsp?categoryId=3200390. Create a registry online or in-store. I heard there are some benefits of in-store registry: some coupons & stuff. Sign up for their coupons in-store. These are different from the online coupons. Also sign up for email deals.
• Watch Happiest Baby on the Block DVD – library or Amazon
• Watch In the Womb – Nat Geo DVD – library or Amazon
• Invest in a Medela or borrow from a friend, then get it tested here: http://www.elcaminohospital.org/Womens_Hospital/Pregnancy_Childbirth/Mother_Baby_Store/. I had http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2815290, this is the newest one http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2901995 and this one required medela feeding bras which are too expy http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3214492.
• Sign up for classes for delivery and breastfeeding.
• In the first week, meet with a lactation consultant – I can’t tell you how useful it was, even though Rian had latched and my milk had come in.
Here go recommendations:
Baby Gear:
• Car seat & stroller: we had Graco Metrolite – lightest travel system that Graco has. Two cars? Get a second base if spouse will be doing some doctor visits. In reality: we used our second base maybe 10 times, but loved having the convenience. Once installed, if you don’t have LATCH in your car, the bases are a pain to re-install. Get some toy bar for car seat. I’d recommend looking into Combi. We recently bought Rian a Combi stroller and its very light weight. Heard that Combi has infant car seats that fit in this stroller too. You can do a stroller frame and an infant car seat too, but personally I found it useful to have a “cover” on the baby which the travel system gives me.
• Baby carrier: I can’t stop saying enough about this one, it’s a life saver. I’ve used it since Rian’s 5th week of life, and still use it. I did a lot of research before buying this, and I can tell you it has saved our back and a lot of pain in life. http://www.ergobabycarrier.com/. I picked it up from http://tinytots.com/ in Campbell.
• Play yard: Since we have 2 functioning levels @ home, used a Graco play yard (pack n play) with a removable bassinet and on-board changer. Used this a lot in our family room.
• Gym: Rian started using a gym for tummy time and for lying on his back and music. I had the baby Einstein one and Rian loves it. http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2736587
• Bouncer: We bought this bouncer http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2265002 and Rian still loves playing with it. Another alternative is an infant to toddler rocker http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3247576
• Swing: there are many types of swings but I got this one http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2265072. Basically I wanted something with a removable tray. I’ve never used the tray and there are cribs for which you cannot remove the tray – that’s just bad engineering IMHO. Travel swings are an option but I knew we wouldn’t move the crib around. Plus a full swing gives you 2 motions.
Infant Care:
• 12 burp cloths & 12 bibs
• Some cloth diapers – multi-use soft cotton cloths. (get from India)
• Lap pads - (get from India)
• Nipple cream – get Lansinoh or Mother Love (whole foods)
• Breast pads
• Feeding bras – I used the $12-$15 ones from Target. I had a size change too sometime in between. Best to buy one pair for the hospital. Then you should go again in a week after the milk comes in.
• Storage for Breast milk from pumping – I got 3 packs of these containers http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2815289. Absolutely useful, BPA-free. Now I use them for Rian’s formula (pre-measured), his cereal, and soon will use for his finger food too.
• Nursing pillow – I had Boppy with a cotton cover
• Nursing wrap – I had this http://www.bebeaulait.com/ - definitely recommend this over just using cloth as it has a “stand” collar so you can see and position baby. Also makes the cloth “stand” so it does not stick to baby’s face. Rian could not tolerate any sensation of touch on his face else he’d start rooting.
• Bottles – Get BPA-free polypropelene or glass. I have 4 3.5oz glass bottles – sufficient for first 3 months. Then I bought 8oz polyprop ones. We used Dr. Brown’s. I’ve heard learning curve breastflow makes transition between breast and bottle (and back – for working moms) easier. I wish I had used these – call me for related story, too long to type. You may need premie nipples. Rian used premie nipples first 3 or 4 months, then we switched him to size 1. I guess every baby is different. Also buy Dr. Brown’s bottle cleaning brush - doesn’t matter what bottle you buy, this brush has a stand that makes the sponge dry – less bacteria breeding. Sterilization is not required – I did it like once a month if we felt like it. You can boil or use this electric one. http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2970575.
• Get a booster like this http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2861764 instead of a high chair. Portable, can strap on anywhere, and can carry to restaurants. We have a rainforest one.
• High chair cover: http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3436925 when you go to restaurants. Rian chews on the chairs.
• Bath tub – I used this one no problems. http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=10727396.
• Get 6 washcloths and 3-4 towels.
• In case you have a baby boy, get like 15-20 of these http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3504785 cheap washcloths or you can use cloth diapers – this is to cover their pee pee when you open the diaper – they squirt ?
• Johnson’s baby wash – yellow and pink. Winter baby, consider getting this http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2440135 especially if prone to dry skin.
• Few bath toys – small rubber duckies work well.
• Nail clippers – I have http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2792506.
• Hair brush – the American red cross one is very nice.
• Baby Oil – Johnson’s
• Baby massage book – http://www.amazon.com/Loving-Hands-Traditional-Baby-Massage/dp/1557043140/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top
• Teethers – 3,4 different kinds
• Pacifiers – experiment, buy BPA-free
• Digital thermometer – I have something like this http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2449560. Big read out and soft tip for reading rectal temp.
• Humidifier – I have a cool mist humidifier. Also serves dual purpose of being a white noise machine. Helps baby sleep longer. Must buy for winter baby. http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2266321.
• Infant Tylenol (Grape flavor), Mylicon, Little Colds Baby Rub, Trivisol (doctor will tell you this @ 2 month check if baby is breastfeeding), gripe water (from India).
• Diaper crèmes: Big 14oz dubba of Aquaphor, 16oz dubba of A+D cream – apply alternately @ diaper changes to keep rash away. In case rash happens, use Boudreaux’s Butt Paste. Keep small tubes of these in the diaper bag.
• Socks & mittens: get lots of pairs from India.
• Diapers: Pampers swaddlers from Newborn to size 2. After that, you should experiment with Huggies too, as Pampers cruisers tend to bunch up at least for baby boys.
• Wipes: I’ve always used Pampers sensitive wipes. There are wipes with “natural cotton” and Rian got a rash with those. YMMV, some people love these. After baby gets onto formula and poop isn’t sweet smelling anymore, we switched to Pampers Swipers scented wipes. You can carry one of the “refill packs” in your diaper bag, never need those travel wipes cases – they’re useless and only carry 5-6 diapers anyways.
• Diaper bags: your choice. Also get a couple from India. It may have a changing pad. Get a few changing pads from India to put all over the house.
• Diaper pail: Baby Trend Diaper Champ http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3491391. You can use the Costco liners inside these, no need to buy costly refills. Contains smell pretty well.
• Baby monitor – we have Fisher Price 900 MHz – very good. http://www.amazon.com/Fisher-Price-Long-Distance-900MHz-Monitor/dp/B000I5RF8C/ but I got it for $38 from Walmart.
• Gates – we have two of these. http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2909941.
• Get CO monitors from Costco – two pack.
• Outlet covers, corner guards, egde guards as required. Depends on how mobile baby is @ 6 months.
Nursery:
• Crib: Drop-side cribs are convenient but there have been too many recalls on those. Personally I didn’t find them sturdy enough. We bought a solid wood one from Amazon in Cherry color to match our bedroom furniture http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000FT7NXS. You can pick out a crib set of your choice. I had a “sea life” theme going with all my stuff.
• Changing table: we bought a changing pad with a cover and put it on top of our dresser. After 6 months babies become too mobile anyways, so we didn’t think buying a separate changing table was worth the money or space.
• Crib mobiles and toys. I have http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2299139 and old version of this http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3565464.
• You may want to invest in a rocking chair. I used my rocker/recliner a lot in early months to put baby to sleep.
• Crib mattress, mattress pad
• Receiving blankets – at least 4. You can get colorful ones from India. Also need Swaddle Me or something like that when receiving blanket swaddle does not work.
• Nursery décor
• Storage solutions. I got the 3 drawer plastic chests from Walmart. Also have some 4 drawer chest from Ikea. Also helps to have the small three drawer chest for items like nail clippers, combs, medicine syringes. Also have a 4 drawer plastic chest for socks, bibs, burp cloths, etc
Clothing and layette:
• Sets of onesies – they come in 5 packs. 0-3 months ka one pack, 3-6 months ka one pack etc. We found onesies very convenient for diaper changes. Get long handed onesies. Sometimes you get onesie and pant sets.
• Get a few body suits since its winter.
• Get a couple of wearable blankets.
• Caps, socks, mittens (socks mitten sets from India)
• Koala baby or Robeez soft soled booties http://www.amazon.com/Robeez-Infant-Toddler-Circles-Pastel/dp/B00119T5CI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=shoes&qid=1246925217&sr=8-1
Toys:
• These are subjective – pick what you like.
Some are TODOs:
• Cocoa butter – stretch marks prevention. Start using around now. It didn’t help me but apparently it helps quite a few people.
• Cord blood – You want to do this early. Figure out if you want to store or donate. We had planned to donate it but we were not qualified. Donate here: http://www.cryo-intl.com/
• Babies R Us: My registry is still online. That was my “shopping list”. I often went back and edited it to keep it in sync with what I bought for Rian. Anyways I have some recommendations below too. Start looking from here http://www.toysrus.com/shop/index.jsp?categoryId=3200390. Create a registry online or in-store. I heard there are some benefits of in-store registry: some coupons & stuff. Sign up for their coupons in-store. These are different from the online coupons. Also sign up for email deals.
• Watch Happiest Baby on the Block DVD – library or Amazon
• Watch In the Womb – Nat Geo DVD – library or Amazon
• Invest in a Medela or borrow from a friend, then get it tested here: http://www.elcaminohospital.org/Womens_Hospital/Pregnancy_Childbirth/Mother_Baby_Store/. I had http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2815290, this is the newest one http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2901995 and this one required medela feeding bras which are too expy http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3214492.
• Sign up for classes for delivery and breastfeeding.
• In the first week, meet with a lactation consultant – I can’t tell you how useful it was, even though Rian had latched and my milk had come in.
Here go recommendations:
Baby Gear:
• Car seat & stroller: we had Graco Metrolite – lightest travel system that Graco has. Two cars? Get a second base if spouse will be doing some doctor visits. In reality: we used our second base maybe 10 times, but loved having the convenience. Once installed, if you don’t have LATCH in your car, the bases are a pain to re-install. Get some toy bar for car seat. I’d recommend looking into Combi. We recently bought Rian a Combi stroller and its very light weight. Heard that Combi has infant car seats that fit in this stroller too. You can do a stroller frame and an infant car seat too, but personally I found it useful to have a “cover” on the baby which the travel system gives me.
• Baby carrier: I can’t stop saying enough about this one, it’s a life saver. I’ve used it since Rian’s 5th week of life, and still use it. I did a lot of research before buying this, and I can tell you it has saved our back and a lot of pain in life. http://www.ergobabycarrier.com/. I picked it up from http://tinytots.com/ in Campbell.
• Play yard: Since we have 2 functioning levels @ home, used a Graco play yard (pack n play) with a removable bassinet and on-board changer. Used this a lot in our family room.
• Gym: Rian started using a gym for tummy time and for lying on his back and music. I had the baby Einstein one and Rian loves it. http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2736587
• Bouncer: We bought this bouncer http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2265002 and Rian still loves playing with it. Another alternative is an infant to toddler rocker http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3247576
• Swing: there are many types of swings but I got this one http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2265072. Basically I wanted something with a removable tray. I’ve never used the tray and there are cribs for which you cannot remove the tray – that’s just bad engineering IMHO. Travel swings are an option but I knew we wouldn’t move the crib around. Plus a full swing gives you 2 motions.
Infant Care:
• 12 burp cloths & 12 bibs
• Some cloth diapers – multi-use soft cotton cloths. (get from India)
• Lap pads - (get from India)
• Nipple cream – get Lansinoh or Mother Love (whole foods)
• Breast pads
• Feeding bras – I used the $12-$15 ones from Target. I had a size change too sometime in between. Best to buy one pair for the hospital. Then you should go again in a week after the milk comes in.
• Storage for Breast milk from pumping – I got 3 packs of these containers http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2815289. Absolutely useful, BPA-free. Now I use them for Rian’s formula (pre-measured), his cereal, and soon will use for his finger food too.
• Nursing pillow – I had Boppy with a cotton cover
• Nursing wrap – I had this http://www.bebeaulait.com/ - definitely recommend this over just using cloth as it has a “stand” collar so you can see and position baby. Also makes the cloth “stand” so it does not stick to baby’s face. Rian could not tolerate any sensation of touch on his face else he’d start rooting.
• Bottles – Get BPA-free polypropelene or glass. I have 4 3.5oz glass bottles – sufficient for first 3 months. Then I bought 8oz polyprop ones. We used Dr. Brown’s. I’ve heard learning curve breastflow makes transition between breast and bottle (and back – for working moms) easier. I wish I had used these – call me for related story, too long to type. You may need premie nipples. Rian used premie nipples first 3 or 4 months, then we switched him to size 1. I guess every baby is different. Also buy Dr. Brown’s bottle cleaning brush - doesn’t matter what bottle you buy, this brush has a stand that makes the sponge dry – less bacteria breeding. Sterilization is not required – I did it like once a month if we felt like it. You can boil or use this electric one. http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2970575.
• Get a booster like this http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2861764 instead of a high chair. Portable, can strap on anywhere, and can carry to restaurants. We have a rainforest one.
• High chair cover: http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3436925 when you go to restaurants. Rian chews on the chairs.
• Bath tub – I used this one no problems. http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=10727396.
• Get 6 washcloths and 3-4 towels.
• In case you have a baby boy, get like 15-20 of these http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3504785 cheap washcloths or you can use cloth diapers – this is to cover their pee pee when you open the diaper – they squirt ?
• Johnson’s baby wash – yellow and pink. Winter baby, consider getting this http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2440135 especially if prone to dry skin.
• Few bath toys – small rubber duckies work well.
• Nail clippers – I have http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2792506.
• Hair brush – the American red cross one is very nice.
• Baby Oil – Johnson’s
• Baby massage book – http://www.amazon.com/Loving-Hands-Traditional-Baby-Massage/dp/1557043140/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top
• Teethers – 3,4 different kinds
• Pacifiers – experiment, buy BPA-free
• Digital thermometer – I have something like this http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2449560. Big read out and soft tip for reading rectal temp.
• Humidifier – I have a cool mist humidifier. Also serves dual purpose of being a white noise machine. Helps baby sleep longer. Must buy for winter baby. http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2266321.
• Infant Tylenol (Grape flavor), Mylicon, Little Colds Baby Rub, Trivisol (doctor will tell you this @ 2 month check if baby is breastfeeding), gripe water (from India).
• Diaper crèmes: Big 14oz dubba of Aquaphor, 16oz dubba of A+D cream – apply alternately @ diaper changes to keep rash away. In case rash happens, use Boudreaux’s Butt Paste. Keep small tubes of these in the diaper bag.
• Socks & mittens: get lots of pairs from India.
• Diapers: Pampers swaddlers from Newborn to size 2. After that, you should experiment with Huggies too, as Pampers cruisers tend to bunch up at least for baby boys.
• Wipes: I’ve always used Pampers sensitive wipes. There are wipes with “natural cotton” and Rian got a rash with those. YMMV, some people love these. After baby gets onto formula and poop isn’t sweet smelling anymore, we switched to Pampers Swipers scented wipes. You can carry one of the “refill packs” in your diaper bag, never need those travel wipes cases – they’re useless and only carry 5-6 diapers anyways.
• Diaper bags: your choice. Also get a couple from India. It may have a changing pad. Get a few changing pads from India to put all over the house.
• Diaper pail: Baby Trend Diaper Champ http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3491391. You can use the Costco liners inside these, no need to buy costly refills. Contains smell pretty well.
• Baby monitor – we have Fisher Price 900 MHz – very good. http://www.amazon.com/Fisher-Price-Long-Distance-900MHz-Monitor/dp/B000I5RF8C/ but I got it for $38 from Walmart.
• Gates – we have two of these. http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2909941.
• Get CO monitors from Costco – two pack.
• Outlet covers, corner guards, egde guards as required. Depends on how mobile baby is @ 6 months.
Nursery:
• Crib: Drop-side cribs are convenient but there have been too many recalls on those. Personally I didn’t find them sturdy enough. We bought a solid wood one from Amazon in Cherry color to match our bedroom furniture http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000FT7NXS. You can pick out a crib set of your choice. I had a “sea life” theme going with all my stuff.
• Changing table: we bought a changing pad with a cover and put it on top of our dresser. After 6 months babies become too mobile anyways, so we didn’t think buying a separate changing table was worth the money or space.
• Crib mobiles and toys. I have http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2299139 and old version of this http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3565464.
• You may want to invest in a rocking chair. I used my rocker/recliner a lot in early months to put baby to sleep.
• Crib mattress, mattress pad
• Receiving blankets – at least 4. You can get colorful ones from India. Also need Swaddle Me or something like that when receiving blanket swaddle does not work.
• Nursery décor
• Storage solutions. I got the 3 drawer plastic chests from Walmart. Also have some 4 drawer chest from Ikea. Also helps to have the small three drawer chest for items like nail clippers, combs, medicine syringes. Also have a 4 drawer plastic chest for socks, bibs, burp cloths, etc
Clothing and layette:
• Sets of onesies – they come in 5 packs. 0-3 months ka one pack, 3-6 months ka one pack etc. We found onesies very convenient for diaper changes. Get long handed onesies. Sometimes you get onesie and pant sets.
• Get a few body suits since its winter.
• Get a couple of wearable blankets.
• Caps, socks, mittens (socks mitten sets from India)
• Koala baby or Robeez soft soled booties http://www.amazon.com/Robeez-Infant-Toddler-Circles-Pastel/dp/B00119T5CI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=shoes&qid=1246925217&sr=8-1
Toys:
• These are subjective – pick what you like.
Doctor doctor...
It was Rian's one year check up today and we were, as usual, ready with our barrage of questions. We met Dr. Harry Dennis as our pediatrician Dr. Linda Strain was on leave. Dr. Dennis was very patient and answered all our questions. Rian got 4 shots today :-( sob, sob! As usual Daddy distracted him from the pain and all was fine in wonderland after 10 mins of motorboat motorboat go so fast!
Rian's doing well and growing well. He took his first bottle of cow's whole milk today. We'll see how his tummy treats it, then go full force with whole milk, no more formula!
Rian also needs to start brushing his teeth now, twice daily. Mommy will start with Rian too :-) Oh come on, I mean about the night time brushing. Of course Mommy brushes in the morning :D
Rian's doing well and growing well. He took his first bottle of cow's whole milk today. We'll see how his tummy treats it, then go full force with whole milk, no more formula!
Rian also needs to start brushing his teeth now, twice daily. Mommy will start with Rian too :-) Oh come on, I mean about the night time brushing. Of course Mommy brushes in the morning :D
Monday, July 6, 2009
Happy first birthday, Rian
One candle on your cake;
Proud parents stare in wonder
At each new move you make.
As this special date arrives,
For Rian has brought pleasure
Into all our lives.
How you progress and grow,
From the cute and tiny infant
You were one year ago.
Enjoy your presents, too.
The reason for this day
Is a special person--you!
Ready or not... Here comes Rian
I'm writing this post from memory, almost a year later, on 7/6/09. I still remember everything that happened, leading up to Rian's birth, crystal clear in my mind.
30 June
This was my 36 week check with my nurse practitioner, and she announced to us that my cervix had completely thinned out. She warned me to wrap up all my work @ office this week, and hand over everything I had on my plate, which was totally echoed by my boss Aleksey. When I checked with Mausami, she mentioned this happened to her too, at the 36th week, but Mausami delivered Shayona in the 41st week, so I was under the impression that I had time. Per my schedule, 11 July was going to be my last working day. I had planned 2 weeks of leave before my EDD of 28 July.
4 July
My mom came from India on 1 July, and was just about getting over her jetlag. Amit and I were eager to go out somewhere as the long weekend had just started. But mom insisted that we pack the hospital bag. With tidbits of house work here and there, we managed to get the hospital bags (yes, we had two!) packed by 11pm. Then we all relaxed.
5 July
Eager to get out and have some fun, we targetted to go for a long drive along CA-1. We stopped at a couple of beaches, then finally reached Santa Cruz beach. We rested and napped in the beautiful sun, on mats. And then it was back home. Amit was experimenting with his new 50mm lens that he bought in preparation for baby's arrival, and took some super cute photos of me.
6 July
It was a lovely Sunday morning, a 3-day weekend well spent, and a whole day to rest. 9am: The moment I got up from the bed, I felt something, fluid... wet... something like a heavy period... watery... hmm... Hello maxipads, tring tring Dr. Swenson (my OB). Sweetest and most patient OB on earth, she explained to me that my water bag had broken. Since I wasn't feeling any pain, she guessed there were no contractions. This was 3 weeks and one day ahead of schedule. She advised me to go for some walks and try to see if we can get the contractions started on our own, and check in to the hospital in 3-4 hours. I was concerned as I had heard we should "rush" to the hospital if the water breaks. Delivery had to "finish" within 24 hours of water break. The hospital would make sure baby was out before 9am on 7 July by C-section if required. Amit calmed my nerves and asked me to follow along with Dr. Swenson's plan.
Mom had just woken up too. Knowing Mom, Amit had an idea that she would panic. So he just told her to get ready and have breakfast, we were going to Costco to buy some essentials. She was a bit curious, but didn't say anything about all the hurry we were in. Thankfully she had a good night's sleep the night before, and was also refreshed.
Meanwhile, I took a shower and had my breakfast. I'd started feeling nervous already. It was too soon, I wasn't ready in my mind. I hadn't painted the baby room. I had one more work week and 2 weeks of rest planned ahead. OTOH, we were well prepared:
2:30pm: We checked into the hospital and were lucky to get into a Labor & Delivery room, they had just one more remaining after checking us in. Immediately, they had all the monitors connected to my tummy. Turns out I was having contractions all the time, and they were three minutes apart! They started asking me about pain, and that's when it hit me: I had some pain in my back - nothing in my abdomen, but periodic pain in my back. Now I feel foolish to have missed it in the first place. I never thought I'd have cramps in the back instead of pain in the abdomen. The attending OB came in to see me, and it was my lucky day - Dr. Swenson, my own OB was on call. She assured me she would deliver my baby before she went off of her shift :-)
I was 3cm dialated. They checked with an ultrasound to see the baby had engaged in the pelvis and was in the correct position. I suspect his face was up and his back was down - which is why I had back labor. But the OB told me everything was "normal" and not to worry about it. They asked me about pain management, and my plan. I was open to the epi, but wanted to try IV painkillers first to see if that would help with the pain. In any case, at this point I was feeling very little pain.
They started me on Pitocin via IV since the OB wanted to increase the intensity of my contractions. The nurse asked me if I wanted some anti-vomiting medication. Since I wasn't feeling nauseous, Amit and I both decided to hold off on it. I started watching Shrek 3 on the TV screen in the room. (For the record: the movie sucked). Then the Pitocin effect kicked in and the pain mounted. We tried all the breathing techniques. Amit inflated my exercise ball and we labored on the ball for a bit.
4:30pm: I asked for the IV painkiller. In 10 mins, I was floating away in no man's land as if I'd downed an entire wine bottle. The pain sure dulled, but it didn't go away. We tried different positions, but help wasn't coming.
5:30pm: I asked to check how dialated I was. Since my water had broken, they were reluctant to check me for fear that they'd introduce infection. Anyways, they checked and I was still 3cm. I could not believe it. 3 hrs and quite some pain later I was still at 3cm. The pain was wearing down on me. I asked for the epidural. The anesthesiologist had just been called into another room, so I had to wait for ~25 mins. I think those were the worst 25 mins of the pain. Amit tried to distract me from the pain, Mom was being her usual sweet self too. Nausea was kicking in. Just before the anesthesiologist came in, I threw up. Now, I'd never thrown up my entire pregnancy, and here I was, epidural guy waiting behind me, and the throw up just would not stop! It was embarassing.
This was probably a resident at Stanford. I believe he had a supervisor too, overlooking his work. He started to read out all the disclaimers and possible side effects to me. I was so upset I told him "I know all these things, now can you just give me the epidural?" I'm sure he was skilled in dealing with women like me :-) He said to me in a firm voice "You may be aware of these but I am required to tell you, and as you can see I'm prepping you in parallel without wasting any time!" :-) Fine, point taken.
6:30pm: The epidural was in. I was now lying flat on the bed, oxygen mask on my nose to make my breathing easier. The pain was vanishing away. I had started to mentally and physically relax. From what I had read and heard in the classes and from my friends, 3cm to 7cm can take the longest, even upto 12 hrs. I thought of taking a nap.
7:15pm: The nurse checked on me and I was already 7cm dialated. We were all very surprised at how quick this went, from 3cm to 7cm after the epidural. The nurse told me that it could still be a while. She told me I'd reach 10cm, and then I'd feel an urge to push. She warned me NOT to push. Amit and mom had been with me for ~5hrs and they had no caffeine. So I asked Amit to go to the cafeteria and grab some coffee/tea, but keep his cell phone near him.
7:30pm: I felt it. I felt the urge to push! I panicked. Amit was out of the room. I called him back from wherever he was. This was way too soon! We paged the nurse. She came in and sternly told me NOT to push. She started prepping to deliver the baby. I couldn't believe it was going to happen. They alerted the doctor.
7:45pm: The doctor came in and gave me an okay to start pushing. The nurse helped me and encouraged me to "find" the contraction myself. There was no pain and I could feel each contraction. When I'd identify it, she would confirm from the electronic screen and then would ask me to push. 5 to 6 pushes later, it looked very promising and Rian's head could be seen. The doctor had a C-section, which she postponed - she wanted to make sure she delivered my baby first. All hands were on deck. Amit suggested we get a mirror so I'd see the head - encourage me to keep pushing. I confirmed with him: will I get grossed out, or will it truly encourage me. He said, trust me, you wouldn't want to miss looking at this. They also made me touch the head. Several pushes later, 45 mins after I'd started pushing, Rian Butala arrived in this world. 8:26pm. He weighed in at 6lb 3oz, 18.5 inches tall. I held onto Rian, the new love of our life.
It was amazing to have delivered Rian within 6 hrs. Thanks to Amit, Dr. Swenson, Mom and nurse Cecilia for all the help and encouragement. A truly memorable and life changing day for all of us.
(Written almost a year later, from memory, on 7/6/09)
30 June
This was my 36 week check with my nurse practitioner, and she announced to us that my cervix had completely thinned out. She warned me to wrap up all my work @ office this week, and hand over everything I had on my plate, which was totally echoed by my boss Aleksey. When I checked with Mausami, she mentioned this happened to her too, at the 36th week, but Mausami delivered Shayona in the 41st week, so I was under the impression that I had time. Per my schedule, 11 July was going to be my last working day. I had planned 2 weeks of leave before my EDD of 28 July.
4 July
My mom came from India on 1 July, and was just about getting over her jetlag. Amit and I were eager to go out somewhere as the long weekend had just started. But mom insisted that we pack the hospital bag. With tidbits of house work here and there, we managed to get the hospital bags (yes, we had two!) packed by 11pm. Then we all relaxed.
5 July
Eager to get out and have some fun, we targetted to go for a long drive along CA-1. We stopped at a couple of beaches, then finally reached Santa Cruz beach. We rested and napped in the beautiful sun, on mats. And then it was back home. Amit was experimenting with his new 50mm lens that he bought in preparation for baby's arrival, and took some super cute photos of me.
6 July
It was a lovely Sunday morning, a 3-day weekend well spent, and a whole day to rest. 9am: The moment I got up from the bed, I felt something, fluid... wet... something like a heavy period... watery... hmm... Hello maxipads, tring tring Dr. Swenson (my OB). Sweetest and most patient OB on earth, she explained to me that my water bag had broken. Since I wasn't feeling any pain, she guessed there were no contractions. This was 3 weeks and one day ahead of schedule. She advised me to go for some walks and try to see if we can get the contractions started on our own, and check in to the hospital in 3-4 hours. I was concerned as I had heard we should "rush" to the hospital if the water breaks. Delivery had to "finish" within 24 hours of water break. The hospital would make sure baby was out before 9am on 7 July by C-section if required. Amit calmed my nerves and asked me to follow along with Dr. Swenson's plan.
Mom had just woken up too. Knowing Mom, Amit had an idea that she would panic. So he just told her to get ready and have breakfast, we were going to Costco to buy some essentials. She was a bit curious, but didn't say anything about all the hurry we were in. Thankfully she had a good night's sleep the night before, and was also refreshed.
Meanwhile, I took a shower and had my breakfast. I'd started feeling nervous already. It was too soon, I wasn't ready in my mind. I hadn't painted the baby room. I had one more work week and 2 weeks of rest planned ahead. OTOH, we were well prepared:
- the car seat was installed and checked,
- the crib was assembled and bedding was installed,
- the stroller was ready,
- the hospital bag was packed,
- Rian's essential clothes (and even non-essential ones) were washed and neatly folded
- the bouncer was assembled,
- the crib was assembled,
- we had diapers, diaper cream, cloth diapers,
- the bottles were washed,
- we had bath essentials,
- we had the dress to bring baby back home in,
- we had a name for the baby that all of us were happy with.
2:30pm: We checked into the hospital and were lucky to get into a Labor & Delivery room, they had just one more remaining after checking us in. Immediately, they had all the monitors connected to my tummy. Turns out I was having contractions all the time, and they were three minutes apart! They started asking me about pain, and that's when it hit me: I had some pain in my back - nothing in my abdomen, but periodic pain in my back. Now I feel foolish to have missed it in the first place. I never thought I'd have cramps in the back instead of pain in the abdomen. The attending OB came in to see me, and it was my lucky day - Dr. Swenson, my own OB was on call. She assured me she would deliver my baby before she went off of her shift :-)
I was 3cm dialated. They checked with an ultrasound to see the baby had engaged in the pelvis and was in the correct position. I suspect his face was up and his back was down - which is why I had back labor. But the OB told me everything was "normal" and not to worry about it. They asked me about pain management, and my plan. I was open to the epi, but wanted to try IV painkillers first to see if that would help with the pain. In any case, at this point I was feeling very little pain.
They started me on Pitocin via IV since the OB wanted to increase the intensity of my contractions. The nurse asked me if I wanted some anti-vomiting medication. Since I wasn't feeling nauseous, Amit and I both decided to hold off on it. I started watching Shrek 3 on the TV screen in the room. (For the record: the movie sucked). Then the Pitocin effect kicked in and the pain mounted. We tried all the breathing techniques. Amit inflated my exercise ball and we labored on the ball for a bit.
4:30pm: I asked for the IV painkiller. In 10 mins, I was floating away in no man's land as if I'd downed an entire wine bottle. The pain sure dulled, but it didn't go away. We tried different positions, but help wasn't coming.
5:30pm: I asked to check how dialated I was. Since my water had broken, they were reluctant to check me for fear that they'd introduce infection. Anyways, they checked and I was still 3cm. I could not believe it. 3 hrs and quite some pain later I was still at 3cm. The pain was wearing down on me. I asked for the epidural. The anesthesiologist had just been called into another room, so I had to wait for ~25 mins. I think those were the worst 25 mins of the pain. Amit tried to distract me from the pain, Mom was being her usual sweet self too. Nausea was kicking in. Just before the anesthesiologist came in, I threw up. Now, I'd never thrown up my entire pregnancy, and here I was, epidural guy waiting behind me, and the throw up just would not stop! It was embarassing.
This was probably a resident at Stanford. I believe he had a supervisor too, overlooking his work. He started to read out all the disclaimers and possible side effects to me. I was so upset I told him "I know all these things, now can you just give me the epidural?" I'm sure he was skilled in dealing with women like me :-) He said to me in a firm voice "You may be aware of these but I am required to tell you, and as you can see I'm prepping you in parallel without wasting any time!" :-) Fine, point taken.
6:30pm: The epidural was in. I was now lying flat on the bed, oxygen mask on my nose to make my breathing easier. The pain was vanishing away. I had started to mentally and physically relax. From what I had read and heard in the classes and from my friends, 3cm to 7cm can take the longest, even upto 12 hrs. I thought of taking a nap.
7:15pm: The nurse checked on me and I was already 7cm dialated. We were all very surprised at how quick this went, from 3cm to 7cm after the epidural. The nurse told me that it could still be a while. She told me I'd reach 10cm, and then I'd feel an urge to push. She warned me NOT to push. Amit and mom had been with me for ~5hrs and they had no caffeine. So I asked Amit to go to the cafeteria and grab some coffee/tea, but keep his cell phone near him.
7:30pm: I felt it. I felt the urge to push! I panicked. Amit was out of the room. I called him back from wherever he was. This was way too soon! We paged the nurse. She came in and sternly told me NOT to push. She started prepping to deliver the baby. I couldn't believe it was going to happen. They alerted the doctor.
7:45pm: The doctor came in and gave me an okay to start pushing. The nurse helped me and encouraged me to "find" the contraction myself. There was no pain and I could feel each contraction. When I'd identify it, she would confirm from the electronic screen and then would ask me to push. 5 to 6 pushes later, it looked very promising and Rian's head could be seen. The doctor had a C-section, which she postponed - she wanted to make sure she delivered my baby first. All hands were on deck. Amit suggested we get a mirror so I'd see the head - encourage me to keep pushing. I confirmed with him: will I get grossed out, or will it truly encourage me. He said, trust me, you wouldn't want to miss looking at this. They also made me touch the head. Several pushes later, 45 mins after I'd started pushing, Rian Butala arrived in this world. 8:26pm. He weighed in at 6lb 3oz, 18.5 inches tall. I held onto Rian, the new love of our life.
It was amazing to have delivered Rian within 6 hrs. Thanks to Amit, Dr. Swenson, Mom and nurse Cecilia for all the help and encouragement. A truly memorable and life changing day for all of us.
(Written almost a year later, from memory, on 7/6/09)
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Bye Bye Baby
A day before his birthday, Rian amazed us with one more milestone: he waved bye bye :-) Daddy was with him, outside our tent cabin in Yosemite valley (Curry Village), and Daddy was teaching him how to wave good bye. That's when I was returning from a shower, and he waved me bye bye :-) Good job, Rian... and great job Daddy.
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