Ready or not... Here comes Rian

I'm writing this post from memory, almost a year later, on 7/6/09. I still remember everything that happened, leading up to Rian's birth, crystal clear in my mind.

30 June

This was my 36 week check with my nurse practitioner, and she announced to us that my cervix had completely thinned out. She warned me to wrap up all my work @ office this week, and hand over everything I had on my plate, which was totally echoed by my boss Aleksey. When I checked with Mausami, she mentioned this happened to her too, at the 36th week, but Mausami delivered Shayona in the 41st week, so I was under the impression that I had time. Per my schedule, 11 July was going to be my last working day. I had planned 2 weeks of leave before my EDD of 28 July.

4 July

My mom came from India on 1 July, and was just about getting over her jetlag. Amit and I were eager to go out somewhere as the long weekend had just started. But mom insisted that we pack the hospital bag. With tidbits of house work here and there, we managed to get the hospital bags (yes, we had two!) packed by 11pm. Then we all relaxed.

5 July

Eager to get out and have some fun, we targetted to go for a long drive along CA-1. We stopped at a couple of beaches, then finally reached Santa Cruz beach. We rested and napped in the beautiful sun, on mats. And then it was back home. Amit was experimenting with his new 50mm lens that he bought in preparation for baby's arrival, and took some super cute photos of me.

6 July

It was a lovely Sunday morning, a 3-day weekend well spent, and a whole day to rest. 9am: The moment I got up from the bed, I felt something, fluid... wet... something like a heavy period... watery... hmm... Hello maxipads, tring tring Dr. Swenson (my OB). Sweetest and most patient OB on earth, she explained to me that my water bag had broken. Since I wasn't feeling any pain, she guessed there were no contractions. This was 3 weeks and one day ahead of schedule. She advised me to go for some walks and try to see if we can get the contractions started on our own, and check in to the hospital in 3-4 hours. I was concerned as I had heard we should "rush" to the hospital if the water breaks. Delivery had to "finish" within 24 hours of water break. The hospital would make sure baby was out before 9am on 7 July by C-section if required. Amit calmed my nerves and asked me to follow along with Dr. Swenson's plan.

Mom had just woken up too. Knowing Mom, Amit had an idea that she would panic. So he just told her to get ready and have breakfast, we were going to Costco to buy some essentials. She was a bit curious, but didn't say anything about all the hurry we were in. Thankfully she had a good night's sleep the night before, and was also refreshed.

Meanwhile, I took a shower and had my breakfast. I'd started feeling nervous already. It was too soon, I wasn't ready in my mind. I hadn't painted the baby room. I had one more work week and 2 weeks of rest planned ahead. OTOH, we were well prepared:

• the car seat was installed and checked,
  
• the crib was assembled and bedding was installed,
  
• the stroller was ready,
  
• the hospital bag was packed,
  
• Rian's essential clothes (and even non-essential ones) were washed and neatly folded
• the bouncer was assembled,
• the crib was assembled,
• we had diapers, diaper cream, cloth diapers,
  
• the bottles were washed,
• we had bath essentials,
• we had the dress to bring baby back home in,
• we had a name for the baby that all of us were happy with.
  

Finally ~10am Amit gave the news to Mom. She was excited, nervous, and was panicking just like me :-) Billy and Lilly had given us a tree sampling to plant the previous Saturday on their wedding day (28 June). I knew I wouldn't have time for it after we got home, so I took Mom's help and planted the tree. Since Dr. Swenson actually wanted me to walk, off we went to Costco. An hr later, still no pain. Hence we assumed: no contractions. Amit suggested some more walking @ Shoreline Lake. The weather was perfect for a stroll. We finished with lunch at the cafe there, and started driving to the hospital.

2:30pm: We checked into the hospital and were lucky to get into a Labor & Delivery room, they had just one more remaining after checking us in. Immediately, they had all the monitors connected to my tummy. Turns out I was having contractions all the time, and they were three minutes apart! They started asking me about pain, and that's when it hit me: I had some pain in my back - nothing in my abdomen, but periodic pain in my back. Now I feel foolish to have missed it in the first place. I never thought I'd have cramps in the back instead of pain in the abdomen. The attending OB came in to see me, and it was my lucky day - Dr. Swenson, my own OB was on call. She assured me she would deliver my baby before she went off of her shift :-)

I was 3cm dialated. They checked with an ultrasound to see the baby had engaged in the pelvis and was in the correct position. I suspect his face was up and his back was down - which is why I had back labor. But the OB told me everything was "normal" and not to worry about it. They asked me about pain management, and my plan. I was open to the epi, but wanted to try IV painkillers first to see if that would help with the pain. In any case, at this point I was feeling very little pain.

They started me on Pitocin via IV since the OB wanted to increase the intensity of my contractions. The nurse asked me if I wanted some anti-vomiting medication. Since I wasn't feeling nauseous, Amit and I both decided to hold off on it. I started watching Shrek 3 on the TV screen in the room. (For the record: the movie sucked). Then the Pitocin effect kicked in and the pain mounted. We tried all the breathing techniques. Amit inflated my exercise ball and we labored on the ball for a bit.

4:30pm: I asked for the IV painkiller. In 10 mins, I was floating away in no man's land as if I'd downed an entire wine bottle. The pain sure dulled, but it didn't go away. We tried different positions, but help wasn't coming.

5:30pm: I asked to check how dialated I was. Since my water had broken, they were reluctant to check me for fear that they'd introduce infection. Anyways, they checked and I was still 3cm. I could not believe it. 3 hrs and quite some pain later I was still at 3cm. The pain was wearing down on me. I asked for the epidural. The anesthesiologist had just been called into another room, so I had to wait for ~25 mins. I think those were the worst 25 mins of the pain. Amit tried to distract me from the pain, Mom was being her usual sweet self too. Nausea was kicking in. Just before the anesthesiologist came in, I threw up. Now, I'd never thrown up my entire pregnancy, and here I was, epidural guy waiting behind me, and the throw up just would not stop! It was embarassing.

This was probably a resident at Stanford. I believe he had a supervisor too, overlooking his work. He started to read out all the disclaimers and possible side effects to me. I was so upset I told him "I know all these things, now can you just give me the epidural?" I'm sure he was skilled in dealing with women like me :-) He said to me in a firm voice "You may be aware of these but I am required to tell you, and as you can see I'm prepping you in parallel without wasting any time!" :-) Fine, point taken.

6:30pm: The epidural was in. I was now lying flat on the bed, oxygen mask on my nose to make my breathing easier. The pain was vanishing away. I had started to mentally and physically relax. From what I had read and heard in the classes and from my friends, 3cm to 7cm can take the longest, even upto 12 hrs. I thought of taking a nap.

7:15pm: The nurse checked on me and I was already 7cm dialated. We were all very surprised at how quick this went, from 3cm to 7cm after the epidural. The nurse told me that it could still be a while. She told me I'd reach 10cm, and then I'd feel an urge to push. She warned me NOT to push. Amit and mom had been with me for ~5hrs and they had no caffeine. So I asked Amit to go to the cafeteria and grab some coffee/tea, but keep his cell phone near him.

7:30pm: I felt it. I felt the urge to push! I panicked. Amit was out of the room. I called him back from wherever he was. This was way too soon! We paged the nurse. She came in and sternly told me NOT to push. She started prepping to deliver the baby. I couldn't believe it was going to happen. They alerted the doctor.

7:45pm: The doctor came in and gave me an okay to start pushing. The nurse helped me and encouraged me to "find" the contraction myself. There was no pain and I could feel each contraction. When I'd identify it, she would confirm from the electronic screen and then would ask me to push. 5 to 6 pushes later, it looked very promising and Rian's head could be seen. The doctor had a C-section, which she postponed - she wanted to make sure she delivered my baby first. All hands were on deck. Amit suggested we get a mirror so I'd see the head - encourage me to keep pushing. I confirmed with him: will I get grossed out, or will it truly encourage me. He said, trust me, you wouldn't want to miss looking at this. They also made me touch the head. Several pushes later, 45 mins after I'd started pushing, Rian Butala arrived in this world. 8:26pm. He weighed in at 6lb 3oz, 18.5 inches tall. I held onto Rian, the new love of our life.

It was amazing to have delivered Rian within 6 hrs. Thanks to Amit, Dr. Swenson, Mom and nurse Cecilia for all the help and encouragement. A truly memorable and life changing day for all of us.

(Written almost a year later, from memory, on 7/6/09)