In January this year, Rian started school, I wrote about it here. Rian went from a 1:1 ratio with the nanny to a 1:12 ratio with the teachers at his 2 yr class back then. He goes for 3 hrs, and is back home at lunch time. We had quite a few hiccups initially as Rian "settled in". Top it off with the cold season, and 2 months of continuous cold and runny nose for Rian. To say the least, we were exhausted. Rian was constantly cranky and refused food most days. It was no surprise that his weight remained the same over a period of 9 months.
Then came summer, and my mom came to visit us. She started making good yummy food for Rian, and Rian's interest in food sparked again. Summer school was in session, with fewer kids. Ratio of student to teacher was much better, although we don't know the exact ratio. We went really "easy" on Rian's schedule, and on most days Rian would reach school by 9:15-9:30. Regular drop off was 8:30 to 8:45. Rian used to miss his morning sheet work, and we were all okay with it. He was happier, and having loads of fun at school.
Fall 2011 session of school started on 22 August, and it feels like January all over again, to me. There are many more kids in school now, so the student teacher ratio is not as good as summer school. Rian complains about a Prahlad in his class who troubles him. He misses his room number 14 and his teachers Miss Angela and Miss Mandy. Now he's in room number 15 and he has new teachers. Rian cries for everything at home. His whining is a stall tactic to delay everything, and get more attention from us. A happy baby who used to finish his milk in 5 mins now takes 25 mins. He vehemently resists his night sleep routine, and blows off all his sleep. It takes him longer to fall asleep now, and he's so unhappy when he wakes up - starts with "I don't want to go to school". He takes all excuses to break into a wail. For the past 2 days he insists on Daddy giving him an oil massage when I take him for his bath. We usually give him an oil massage on the weekends, and he enjoys the happy relaxed time.
First activity in school is sheet work - every day. When students are late, they miss sheet work. Earlier in his 2 yr class, and his summer school, teachers would take Rian on the side and make up for missed sheet work during play hours. This was the 1-on-1 help that the school specializes in. But now the Principal Miss Manet told me - if Rian is consistently late, we will not give him 1-on-1 to make up for missed work. I think that is totally fair. This week though, Rian started getting empty sheets home with remarks on them: absent, came in late - please complete at home. Somehow I find this very unsettling. A 3 yr old is expected to finish his missed classwork at home? Really? I always used to think homework and all those boring things start from Kindergarten. Rian has 2 more years to get there!! I was just not mentally prepared to handle homework for my 3 yr old.
I guess the school is trying to send a message - don't make a habit of sending your child late to class every day. Sigh, I guess they are right. This is not day care. This is school - way more serious, and academically geared. This was our choice for little Rian since letters and numbers fascinated him. But the student teacher ratio was not our choice :-( I wish I can find an academically geared school for Rian with a 1:6 ratio - that would be my dream come true. For now, I have to settle with our current school and make peace with myself about our schedule. We are back to early mornings with a manic schedule. Saving grace is my mom is still here and takes care of Rian's breakfast in the mornings, and our lunch/dinners too.
6:30am - wake up, potty, brush, make coffee and milk
7am - wake Rian up, give him his 10 mins to laze, give him milk
7:20am - take Rian for potty, bath, brush
7:35am - Rian wears his clothes with Daddy
7:45am - Rian takes his breakfast with Aaji
8am - lock and load
8:25am - reach school, drop Rian off
After that, I battle a super jam packed I-280 since its pre-9am, carpool hours. A journey of 15 miles that takes me 20 mins post 9:15am takes me 35 mins in crazy traffic now. I guess the silver lining is I'm in my office at 9am.
Now that I got that out of my system, let me get to some "real work".
Hugs to you and Rian , I feel you should give a try to change school and try something else, I don't think studies is so important at this age, what is more important is they should have interest in the concept of school, friends and teachers. I completely agree with you, Rian is so young to come home and do homework. They learn so many things from each of us including school, you might want to try some school where they give more importance to people than syllabus. Just couldn't stop myself from give my piece of advise but as always trust your instincts and take a call.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your thoughts, LF. I go back n forth between these thoughts too, good to have another opinion to discuss.
ReplyDeleteSo, I need to find something with a ratio better than 1:12. For his age of 3, there is no school in the area with better ratio :-(
Also, the reason for academically inclined school was my 2 yr old was showing all motivation and inclination towards ABCs and numbers. We thought of encouraging his natural disposition. The other extreme I've seen is day cares and schools that do not introduce writing till kids become 4 yr old.
I do agree whole heartedly with you that at this age, he needs to feel "fun" going to school. Else he will end up hating school forever.
Hi Mamata,
ReplyDeleteIt's Kasturi.
This post sure scares me...I had it fixed in my mind that Mitali would start school at age 3, but now at 2 yrs, 3 months - she is starting to show cues of school readiness. So probably might start sending her at 2.5 yrs. But still in denial with it- how can she show readiness so fast. At the same time, I don't want to push her too soon as well. A quick question - is Rian's school a montessori program school or a regular school? I have heard montessori programs are more loose-ended and not so rigidly structured.
@Kasturi, welcome to my blog after a long time :-)
ReplyDeleteRian started school when he was 2 yrs & 6 months. Girls generally mature earlier, so 2 yrs & 3 months sounds perfect to me. Is she talking and expressing clearly?
The focus of Montessori philosophy is getting the kids to learn to do their tasks on their own, making them more independent. That was my first choice, but the best Montessori school in my area had a huge waiting list. One thing though - they were not very "studies" centric. Meanwhile we chanced upon a very good academic school, and we decided to go this way since Rian was too much into letters and numbers.